Saturday, January 20, 2007

Fire Horse

In the Chinese Zodiac, I am a Horse. I used to be pretty unhappy with that, thinking that horses as mundane and unattractive animals. That was until I saw a chinese ink painting of a horse. The lines were bold and strong, the animal was proud, energtic. It had places to go, things to accomplish. This was no mundane creature, shackled to the whim of a master. This horse was in command. It would carry you if it wished to carry you.
I could identify with the Horse then. Even more so, when I found out that I was a Fire Horse. In fact, according to everything I had read I WAS fire. It was my element. Perhaps that was why I often felt the heat of life coursing in my veins, the flowing fire allowing me to create.

That is what creativity is, for me. It is my life's blood, rushing through me. The endless thoughts that play in my head, then appear on the paper. Sometimes, it's a mad and fiery clamour and rush. Sometimes it's a gentle and contemplative song. Rarely, it's a struggle with the soul, a wrestling match between me and my grudging pysche.

I would be lying if I said my life was easy. I have a dehibilitating illness, and I am more fragile than I appear. Yet wouldn't change myself. Having had this fire within me all my life, I don't know what life would be without it. I merely accept, and write. Then, if the fire gets too hot, I burn. It's better than the alternative, which is no fire at all.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well written article.

Tinkerbelle said...

Thank you... I feel humbled when people like my writing.